150 Festive Christmas Instagram Captions (2024)

Tis the season to be jolly asf or stressed asf. I personally love Christmas. There’s just something about the holidays that brings out the best in people. Something about the gently falling snow, Christmas lights, and sparkly sequin dresses truly make the season bright. Instagram is definitely made for the holiday spirit so I’ve rounded the most clever, funny, and punny Christmas Instagram captions.

There’s nothing I love more than Christmas candles with scents like Christmas trees. Plus, I enjoy witty Christmas puns as much as the next person… Speaking of which… You may be wondering, what are some good Christmas sayings? Christmas captions are a thing of art. I went through a bunch of different lists to bring you the best Instagram captions for Christmas and some that are Gina Bear originals with my dirty and snarky sense of humor.

Table of Contents

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Funny Christmas Captions

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.
Santa saw my Instagram photos. Apparently I’m getting a bible for Christmas…
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.
Dear Santa, I can explain / is it too late to say sorry? / define nice.
I’m the only gift you need.
But first, let me take an elfie.
Christmas is when we sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of socks.
Co-workers are like Christmas lights. Some of them hang together and the others aren’t so bright.
May your days be boozy and bright.
Feast mode, engage.
I’m dreaming of a wine Christmas.
I’m full of holiday spirit. It’s called wine.
Go elf yourself.
Christmas cheer? Christmas Beer?
I’m so getting coal this year.
I’m a gangsta wrapper.
My favorite color is Christmas lights.
I’m so getting coal this year…
Dasher, dancer, prancer, vixen, rum, vodka, and whiskey.

Christmas Pun Captions

Me every day: SLAY. Me in December: Sleigh.
Resting Grinch face.
Yule be sorry.
I’m pine-ing for you.
You’re sleighin it!
I’m here to sleigh.
You’re my soul Santa.
Stay safe this holiday season with Santa-tizer.
Up to snow good.
She came, she thawed, she conquered.
Treat yo’ elf.
Believe in your elf.
A rebel without a Claus.
Believe in your elf.
Totally sleighed it.
Let’s get blitzened.
Oh Deer…

Christmas Captions For Dogs

We woof you a hairy Christmas!
Here comes Santa Paws.
Santa Paws is coming to town.
Happy Howl-idays!
Feliz Navi-dog!
Bark! The herald angels sing!
It’s a Christmas paw-ty!
It’s a pugly sweater party.
Paws-itvely merry and bright.
Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
May your Christmas be furry and bright!
Dear Santa, I want new owners for Christmas.
Dear Santa, the elf did it.

Christmas Cookie Captions

Christmas cookies make everything better.
A balanced holiday diet is a Christmas cookie in each hand.
The only thing I double fist is Christmas cookies.
Christmas cookies is how the holiday starts.
Make frosting, not dough.
Santa, stop here! We have Christmas cookies!
Christmas is more than presents. It’s about cookies too.
Christmas cookie calories don’t count…
Christmas is the only time eating cookies for breakfast is socially acceptable.
Official Christmas cookie tester.
Sweet as a Christmas cookie.

Christmas Captions For Couples

It was love at frost sight!
Baby, you had me at ho, ho, ho.
He’ll/She’ll be sleighin my name later.
We’re a couple of candy canes—sweet and slightly twisted.
Tis the season for loving you.
Tis the season for matching pjs.
The holly to my jolly.
The only person I’ll watch Hallmark holiday movies with.
Love you as much as I love Christmas cookies.
We’re snuggled up like two birds of a feather.
I’ve got the best present of all this Christmas.
Sweater weather is better together.
The best part of cuffing season.
What happens under the mistletoe, stays under the mistletoe.
You’re the only present I don’t want to exchange.
Baby, it’s cold outside. Let’s snuggle here.
You rock my Christmas socks.
Smitten like a pair of mittens.
You’re my favorite Christmas gift.

Christmas Captions With Friends

All the jingle ladies.
Friends make the season merry and bright.
Friends that sleigh together stay together.
A snowball to the face is proof of an everlasting friendship.
Santa is so jolly because he knows where the bad girls live.
Drink up Grinches! I’m with my b*tches.
What do besties do during the holidays? Drink mulled wine and talk shit.
Jolliest bunch of elves this side of the nuthouse.
Sleigh all day then cabernet with the jingle ladies.
You are the jingle to my bells.
You are the candy to my cane.
Some people are worth melting for. — Olaf
Getting the rum-pa-pa-pum with my betches.
Friends like you make the season bright.
VIP Naughty list members.
Snowflakes unite!

Christmas Captions For Singles

Single and ready to jingle.
All I want for Christmas is food.
Got all my tinsel in a tangle.
Looking for my holi-bae.
Dear Santa, I’m looking to take a baecation. Can you send a good man?
Dear Santa, I was really good at being naughty. Does that count?
I can smell the mistletoe I’m not going to be kissed under.
Single bells. Single bells. Single all the way.
Maybe next year I’ll be a hoe, hoe, hoe.
I’m like the snow. Cold, but beautiful.
Sip me baby one more time.
All I want for Christmas is [insert dream man’s name here].
Current status: ready for a long winter nap.
Dear Santa, I’m tired of ringing my own jingle bells.
Dear Santa, Can I have your list of naughty boys?
Why is a Christmas tree better than men? It stays up, has cute balls, and looks good with the lights on.
I need the nut to my cracker.

Christmas Tree Captions For Instagram

Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree.
Rockin around the Christmas tree.
The tree is getting spruced up this holiday season.
The tree isn’t the only thing getting lit this year.
Be like a Christmas tree and shine bright in the darkness.
Be like a Christmas tree and when the tough gets going, add glitter.
Be like a Christmas tree and share your gifts.
Be like a Christmas tree. You were born to sparkle.
It’s not what’s under the Christmas tree that matters, it’s who is around us.
Let’s make like a Christmas tree and get lit.

Christmas Eve Captions

Twas the night before Christmas.
’Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, everyone was scrolling through Insta.
My invite to Kris Jenner’s Christmas Eve Party got lost in the mail.
Can’t wait to see what Santa bought for me.
Happy Holidays from Santa’s favorite elves.
Have yourself a merry little Christmas.
The feeling’s here that only comes this time of year.
Tis the season to sparkle.
Here comes Santa Claus.
Dear Santa, just leave your credit card under the tree.

Christmas Day Captions For Instagram

You know what I got for Christmas? Fat. I got fat.
Treat every day like Christmas.
“Feliz Navidad, próspero año y felicidad.” —José Feliciano
A Christmas to rival any Hallmark holiday movie.
Merry Christmas to all!
It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Happy Holidays from Santa’s favorite elves.
Simply having a wonderful Christmas time.
Happy Holla-Days.
Although it’s been said, many times, many ways, Merry Christmas to you.
Put Christmas in your heart all year.
Merry Elf-in Christmas!
I’m only a morning person on December 25th.
But first, Christmas gifts.
The giver is more important than the Christmas gift.

Winter Captions For Instagram

Everyday I’m shovelin.
Feelin frosty.
Have an ice day!
I’d rather shovel sand than snow.
Snow, coming to a street near you.
It’s a winterful life.
Jingle bells, Santa smells, it’s snowin every day.
You have two choices when it snows — shovel or make snow angels.
Waking up to a winter wonderland.
When life gives you snow, make snow angels.
The forecast is un-brrr-leivable.
Up to snow good.
The world changes when it snows.
Do you want to build a snowman?

I hope this post gave you a bunch of inspiration for your Christmas captions for Instagram. Remember it’s all about the wonderful holiday feeling so try not to stress yourself out too much and enjoy your loved ones. After living abroad for almost nine years, I’m so happy to spend the holidays with the people I love most.

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