Things I Hate About Japan

In lieu of all the Japan posts, I’ve been inspired to write a blog post I never dared share before. Back in the day, when I was a novice blogger, I never DREAMED of writing such a strong opinion about Japan because I was so afraid of backlash (particularly from the scary Japanophiles who think Japan is a paradise on Earth). Now, I just don’t care. I am a human and I’m here to give my full and uncensored opinion on things I hate about Japan.

Don’t get me wrong. This isn’t me saying Japan is the worst country on the planet. I lived there for three years so obviously I liked it enough to stay that long despite my trials and tribulations.

HOWEVER…

Going back to Japan made me realize the things that drove me absolutely INSANE about the country and why those tiny things became things I just really hated about Japan.

Although The Land of the Rising Sun was my first love, let’s talk about some of the things I hate about Japan. If you think some of these reasons are petty… It’s because they are.

Related: Twelve Things I MISS About Japan

Back Handed Compliments

I once had a woman at a sports massage clinic tell me I needed to stop getting so dark. She said I was pretty, but my skin was too burnt and I needed to wear more sunscreen and gloves.

***Drops burrito.***

To add insult to injury, she insisted the whiter I was, the better it would be for me. Perhaps she meant well and didn’t want to see me get skin cancer or anything, but what the hell? I never asked for her opinion or comments on my skin tone.

The thing is, she judged me and didn’t know my life. I always wore sunscreen in Okinawa. I was never on the beach without it and I was never in the sun from 12p.m. to 3p.m. I hated getting sunburns as much as the next person. Since I was young, I was always super pale in winter from the lack of sun and super dark in summer because I easily tan.

Besides, if I wanna be out on the beach and be brown, that’s my prerogative, lady. I don’t need you pushing your beauty standards on me… Sadly, this wasn’t the first time a back handed compliment was paid to me.

I also had people rag on me for getting strong muscles at Cross Fit, being tall, and not being feminine enough in the way I dressed. Like, my bad bro, I didn’t know the purpose of my life was to be visually appealing in yours. It also didn’t help that I couldn’t find clothes in my size and ones I did find were absolutely ugly and unflattering.

Related: Dear Japan, We Have to Break Up

Dating

Don’t think your girl forgot what it was like to date in Japan. Dating in Japan is STILL a bloody nightmare for me to this day.

On my recent trip to Tokyo, I was approached by a really strange man who opened with speaking to me in Japanese. Once he got a good look at my face, he replied with a shocked, “You’re not Japanese.”

I think it’s safe to say, Sherlock, I don’t look remotely Japanese.

Then, he complimented my Japanese abilities and asked where I lived. I said I lived in Korea and immediately after he asked, “Do you have a boyfriend?”

LIKE. WHUT?

You don’t ask complete strangers this question like… EVER. I lied and told him I had a boyfriend who was Korean. He then proceeded to keep talking and say that I must be one of those foreigners that just likes Asian dudes.

Apparently my look of disgust did not deter him as he continued to say since I was American, we have open relationships in my country. What did I think about a relationship with a Japanese?

Imagine the look of horror the moment I realized he just called me a slut… To my face no less.

You think this is bad? Well, I’m only getting started.

When I lived in Japan, I had guys lie to me about having girlfriends, many instances of being led on because they liked the attention, guys who had a foreigner fetish, guys approaching me for free English lessons and military jerks who just wanted a fling.

Related: Why Dating SUCKS for Foreign Women in Japan

Driving

I never had road rage while I lived in America. Then again, with lots of space and huge highways that span miles, there’s not much to get upset about. We also have lanes designated for how fast or slow you want to drive.

On Okinawa, everyone just drove slow as molasses.

People were also really good at weaving in and out of traffic (myself included). I never mentioned the three car rule before now, but this one was also a hoot. When the traffic light turned red, there were still three cars going through the intersection.

As for taxi drivers, I’m sure we can all agree that they drive like shit no matter where you are in the world. Okinawa was no exception.

Also, now that a lot of time has passed, some dickhead police officers gave me a ticket on my birthday for talking on the phone while driving. Now, I know that I technically shouldn’t have been doing this, but they kept insisting I was in the military and asking me for my military ID (even though I had a hiragana plate car and alien registration card).

***Drops second burrito.***

After about thirty minutes of me trying to gaijin smash my way out of a hopeless situation, I ended up with a ticket. Later that night, I had a bonfire with the ticket in my parking lot. I know it was super petty, it was my small way of giving the middle finger to the authorities who almost ruined my birthday.

Related: Advice You NEED For Moving to Japan

Making Friends

I had a really hard time making friends in Japan because of the culture. Many Japanese are polite and kind to everyone they meet. They’re taught from a young age to be considerate towards others.

How much of it is genuine though?

I’ve spoken to the Japanese friends I did have and they said confrontation is the thing they hate most… Which is why if they hate you, they will never say anything because they will avoid an altercation at all costs. That also means if you were talking about something and you disagreed, everyone will just agree instead of having a different opinion.

When I did make friends in Japan, it was because they had lived abroad and were super open minded. One of my really good friends loved Latin American culture and we bonded over music, food, and laughter.

She would teach me about Okinawa culture and I would teach her about Mexican culture. Some of my fondest memories of my time in Japan are with her prowling around Araha Beach looking for cute boys.

Related: What Makes Japan a Difficult Country to Live in?

Restricted PR

I absolutely hated going to concerts in Japan and not being able to take photos. The only time I got some relief from this rule is when I went on the Kadena Air Base and got to record and use my cellphone all I wanted.

Free PR is the BEST PR.

Social media can make or break a business, product, brand, or even person. For the life of me, I still don’t understand why Japan doesn’t understand that.

I was walking around Harajuku, minding my own business when while I was filming, I got yelled at not to do it near a store. It was actually quite frightening because no one ever yelled at me like that in Japan before.

Needless to say, as a blogger, vlogger, YouTuber, and Instagrammer, nothing will piss me off more than when I’m filming myself in a place and someone tells me to bugger off.

Related: How I Got Fat in Japan

Technologically Backwards & Advanced

Have you ever heard of the Robot Restaurant in Kabukicho? No? Well, let me break it down for you. It’s literally the most crazy place I’ve ever been to and I liked it. It’s a show with giant robots controlled by wifi and it’s probably one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen.

While there are cool robots to entertain you, screens to take your order at a sushi restaurant, and warm toilets with fancy buttons, there are still some things Japan hasn’t caught up to.

For example, the amount of paperwork needed to do file your residency, open a bank account, or have a phone contract literally gives me a headache.

I STILL have nightmares that make me want to burst into tears about having to start a process all over again because I didn’t have the right paperwork.

So while in some ways, Japan has many useless useful inventions, at the same time, they’re still cutting down a lot of trees, using chalkboards in classrooms, and using keys to enter their homes.

It’s the strangest paradox I’ve ever witnessed.

Related: Cultural Fatigue in Japan

In case I haven’t said this enough, Japan was my first love. There were so many whacky and interesting parts of the country that just really drew me in and made me fall in love with it.

As time progressed, I saw Japan for the beautiful and terrible place it really was. While there were many things about the country I had come to love and hate, it almost feels like an ex boyfriend to me.

Time has passed so I no longer feel better and I recall Japan as a beautiful memory. When I revisit the country, I feel like a part of my heart was left there. The truth is, Japan will have a piece of my heart there forever and I look forward to traveling there again.

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